all you wanted is only one, you want to be accepted, appreciated, you want people to see your value.

it's really hard on this bad and so selfish world.
you never ask people to respect you, or trying to do the work to make others think that you're a good person. you just want your work that you considered as a hard work but not with people, to be appreciated as yours, not anyone else.

i know it's so tiring and heart breaking, see all those hardship whipped away and remembered as someone else's. all the reality just keep bringing you down.

why do those who seems to be talkactive get more trust from others? and you're as an original, the silent type, don't even get the consideration of being more trustworthy?

are you sure you can handle the pain and the burden? are you sure what you're afraid of won't happen? well, that's up to you.

Rules?! hmm one of a thing.

What are rules?  how does it work? where can we find rules?

why do I love rules?

so, in the status quo right now, the rules are easy to be made, hard to be implemented (*just my subjective opinion*).

one of the reason, the most important one, rules make life easier. it guided us, helping to make a decision since everything needs to be based on the rules that exist. (*again, my subjective opinion*).

*a piece of my random thought.

-im

I've seen many people willing to sacrifice and struggle for doing the thing based on the standard that they have set, which is most of them willing to put their best effort on it. The determination of doing the best is not a common thing. But I've met a lot of awesome people. And Currently, I've seen the spirit of doing the same on myself.

At first, the idea of doing the best still confused me. Is it doing the best or being the best?

After things that happened to me in the past 2 years, I realized that being the best isn't the right purpose. But let's back to the topic, Why am I willing to do the best. In this chance, I'll talk about my academic section of life.

I personally believe and keep reminding myself that the reasons behind this are to make my parents less worried about me, God and my religion, and of course for the sake of my own happiness.

Talking about the first reason, making my parents feel less worried about me, my future. Slowly taking the burden they have by showing that I'm doing well and they don't have to worried about the future. How am I going to survive in life, where the competition is tight. Even if my best effort won't always give a good result, they believe that the efforts won't be wasted. Somehow, it helped you, and for sure, it will happen at the right time. But before moving to the next reason, let me tell you why this reason came first in my mind. It is because where the whole idea of this writing came off.

The second reason is that God and my religion told me that all of the things I did will be paid later. Whether is it the bad or good deed. That's why I think that it's better to do the good deed and do it with the best effort. The result won't matter because God has guaranteed that for us.

The last but not least, for the sake of my own happiness. I'm sure everyone deserves to be happy, so do I. In the past, I believe that every aspect of my life should be the best. But I have changed it. Right now, I already put on my mind that I need to do the best, make my best effort in every aspect of life. From that, I'm motivated to be a better person every day by learning from my failure and learning throughout the processes.

Well done, I've done this writing, maybe this isn't a good one but I'm relieved that I've delivered this.

AUTHOR.